Sunday, April 15, 2012

Reman Mythology Archives


"I don't want to spoil people from the upcoming (indefinitely in-progress and never published) novel."
"I don't want to disappoint new readers with a story that doesn't end."
"The drawings are so outdated."
"I don't really draw comics anymore."
"I just want to start from scratch."

I had a million reasons to take Reman Mythology down from the web. Scratch that: I had a million excuses. The biggest one that I never stated: "I want to pretend it never existed."

It seems a strange thing to say, but after finishing Sorcerers & Secretaries, I was ashamed of pretty much everything I did in comics. I told people I hated Sorcerers & Secretaries, that I thought both that and Reman were silly and stupid. I had so much guilt for leaving the "comics church," as I called it, and pursue my dream of being a writer. Comics was my friends, my family, my hobby, my career. It was my life. I felt like I was abandoning so much work and faith by switching gears that I wanted to pretend I never did any comics for a while, and my shame in my comics was a way to divert the guilt I felt for leaving.

Five years later and I'm still trying to figure out novel writing. I'm on the search for new representation with an agent, and still perfecting the novelization of Rema to the best of my abilities. Having to search for an agent means having to write uncomfortable things like query letters and plot summaries. It means I have to talk proudly of my work as a comic artist, guilty for leaving comics or not, and it made me realize how silly I've been in not taking more pride in the work of my past. I may not draw comics anymore, but it doesn't mean I never drew them and I never learned anything from them. Regardless of how many years it will take me to find a new agent or get published again, the process of putting my manuscript out there has been invaluable.

When I look at my comics it feels like they were drawn by a different person, but they weren't. It was still me. Younger, more ambitious, and less patient, maybe, but still me. I should stop pretending it wasn't.

Long story short, you can re-read Reman Mythology again if the fancy strikes you. The archives are back up on their old url, http://www.felaxx.com/RM.